There is a lot of stuff that goes through my head on a daily basis. I am sure that is the same with most of us. The things that I went through growing up shaped a lot of my thinking and belief systems. But so did simple observations and the logical deductions that came from them. From that I have become what I believe to be a very wonderful person with a big heart though not always oriented towards putting up with peoples delusions. I work very hard at riding myself of delusions and if I can't at least naming what they are and if they are not hurtful i.e. having crushes on movie stars and rock stars, then just enjoying them. My path to the creating the least amount of suffering for the entire planet as a whole has lead me down what some might think is a lonely path. I must admit sometimes it's difficult to live like I do because part of it is not by choice and part of it is. Things like moving a great deal when I was child with my parents were not my choice. It left me never having any long term friendships or romantic relationships. Being an only child that compounded a lot of just learning to be alone without actually being lonely. That along with seeing the way society was operating, level of suffering of humanity as a whole, divorced parents, the state of the environment, our burgeoning lack of food due to capitalism and ignorant farming techniques and threat of wars: well it lead me down the path of being a single lady with no kids. I have been called many things for my belief system and looked down on for not wanting to follow suit on the social norms or be in a relationship that wasn't right for me just based on needing to be loved. The world basically ignores and makes fun of single childless women as if we don't know what we are missing. I would be insulted if I actually cared. I find solace in my logic and my ability to actually love myself and be happy without the need for outside sources creating it. I feel I have created more life on this planet by not creating life in my womb. The earth is my mother and my child. I baby her and I love her. She is my truest love and I worship the ground I walk on. She made me a special type of bisexual, she mad me beautiful and she made me love her with her constant feeding me and keeping me warm with her perfect position from the sun. I love her for making me wonderful friends in all forms of trees, animals and people. I love her elements and her spirit. She is a living being that I adore. She is Mother Earth and she has a fever right now from a virus called humanity. She is getting warmer and warming trying to kill off the germs we are because of our ignorant actions and naive self-centeredness. And it's really hard for me to see the being I love most in the world go through what she is going through. So forgive me if your hurt feelings don't phase me. I wish they were not hurt. But all forms of naive behavior goes through a period of trying to defend the actions claiming what needs to be claimed to hold on to old ways before rock bottom forces us to see the truth in what we are doing. After every invention of birth control we have come up with from removing uterus', tying tubes, snipping tubes, spermicides, condoms, pills, diaphragms, planning and the knowledge the humans are killing everything in our path to make way for more of us, we continue to spew out babies like it's a fiesta. To me, it's kinda disgusting to think about. More than disgusting. Put every horny man unwilling to have a vasectomy in one room and every woman on the planet that is pregnant and or giving birth in a room across from them lets watch this lovely miraculous moment shall we? To me it looks more like a disgusting species multiplying like other organisms that have life spans of 24 hours. But we are not here for 24 hours we are here for at the very least 50 years and at the most 120. And in that time we as the only species that produces garbage will demand rights and food and housing and everything else that we do not afford every other spices on this planet. All so you can look longingly into someones eyes in hopes that they one day look up at you and say: I LOVE YOU.
Well let me help. I LOVE YOU! I love you more than anything. but you probably don't believe that. You probably don't believe that I am not having children for your sake and your children's sake and so on. So before you don't want a friend like me because I called our species naive perhaps you should just calm down and think about why I might be doing this and why you might be upset. Your mistake is going to mow through more animals planets and garbage than my hurting your feelings so you could live your over indulgent life.
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